WTH?

DEAR AMY:

How much recovery time does a younger widow need before she is ready to date?
A few months ago, a co-worker of several years lost her husband unexpectedly.
While talking to her about the tragedy, I realized I am deeply in love with her.
She represents everything I have been searching for in a relationship.
I sense she also has feelings for me, though probably not at the same intense level. My problem is that I don't know when or if I should approach her with my romantic intentions. If she is not ready for a new relationship, my actions could break her heart all over again, and I might lose her forever. -- Paralyzed By Love

DEAR PARALYZED:

There is no strict protocol for when grieving people are ready or available to date, but do yourself and your friend a favor and don't make any sudden moves.

Your admission to being deeply in love with someone you haven't yet dated is a red flag. At the very least, you should turn the heat way down. You may have a crush or an attraction, but you should shelve the "love" talk.

You should be reserved and respectful with your friend. Don't push for anything more than coffee and conversation. If she is ready to date, she'll find a way to let you know.